Me, Myself, and I(ron)

Ah, anemia...just when I forget all about you, there you are, tugging at my ankles and weighing them down, laying your weight across my quads and my biceps, turning my shoulders and neck to lead.  I loathe you...

It's one of those on-again, off-again relationships, and I am so much happier and so much more me when it's off again.  I've been pretty religious about taking my iron supplements and eating more spinach than Popeye could fit in both biceps, but the last few days have seen me sliding ever-so-ungracefully out from beneath the covers and lurching through my day.  I wish I could say through my workouts, but today was my first sweat session in three days.  Just in case you're unaware, that's kind of unheard of around these parts.  This is a gal who likes to get her sweat on.

My plan had been to readjust to those pre-dawn workouts, pretty much my only guaranteed time to be all alone with Shaun T or grab an outdoor run.  My alarm goes off each day at 5:45; I immediately shut it off and commence staring at the ceiling, checking my Facebook notifications, and catching up on all those missed late-night talk shows I can no longer stay awake to watch.  I ponder reaching to my left and mixing my E&E to garner the required energy to simply start my day.  But it's too much most days.  And so I feel sad, a tad guilty, and still exhausted. 

The amount of sleep just doesn't matter.  I can sleep a little; I can sleep a lot.  I have become the Goldilocks of sleeping, but I still haven't found the "just right" amount when anemia slithers into bed.  If you've dealt with low iron, you know the feeling.  If you haven't, you're probably thinking, "She's just lazy."  And you can go right ahead and slap yourself in your smug little face, seeing as how my arm is too weary for me to do it.  This gal, right here, ain't lazy.  When it comes to putting laundry away (I have a strong aversion to returning anything to its rightful place) or retrieving the mail (all the way across the street? Why can't they just put it on my porch?), perhaps a tad.  But when we're talkin' workouts, running, lifting, sweating...I am anything BUT.  In fact, I push myself to make these sessions as tough as possible.  I live for this crap.  So anemia really pisses me the f#$k off.

Which is why today I forced myself to mix and drink that E&E and push through Cardio Power and Resistance.  I am so freaking amazing.  Not only did I manage to get through it, but I got through it with very few modifications.  I was a tad slower than usual, but I managed to eke out every move with proper form.  That's pretty balls-to-the-wall awesome, and I thank you for realizing that.  Could I have done it without E&E?  I really don't think so.  A slow walk would have been more my speed.  But with the E&E, anemia was my BITCH. 

So I vow that tomorrow morning, I will drink sooner and save Colbert, Stewart, and Handler for laundry sorting time (that's when I cart the clean clothes to my bedroom, spread them over my bed, and then sit down and watch tv and marvel at how quickly I have run out of time to actually sort the laundry).  That just leaves the question...who's workin' out with me tomorrow morning????

What Runners Don't Tell You...

It's funny because it's true.  Although I must admit, I don't have a black toenail yet.  I do, however, sport two blood blisters and multiple callouses.  Pretty feet are simply not part of being a runner.  I mourned the loss of several hard-earned callouses two weeks ago when I went for what I thought was an innocent pedicure.  No one had warned me otherwise; I felt I deserved a treat for all the hard work I've been putting in.  It was dumb.  When I returned from my 16+ mile run the following day, I had enormous and incredibly painful blood blisters that frightened my children and sent them backing out of the room, away from me and my hideous feet, looks of disgust on their precious little faces.  Lesson #1: love your nasty feet.  Do not attempt to beautify them.  Focus instead on your lovely legs.  Lesson #1.5: invest in good socks.  $12.99 may seem pricey at first, but it becomes a hell of a lot cheaper when you're trying to wedge your sore feet into any shoes other than slippers.

Good socks and better bandaids.  And they always look good in running shoes.

Lesson #2:  If you run any serious distances, you're gonna have the urge do make a number two.  It is not a pleasant topic nor one to brag about.  ("You won't believe the BM I had when I finished my run! Incredible!")  I suppose this is why nobody warned me...but I discovered it on my own last summer while training for my half.  And discovered it again while running the half and being forced into portapotties after other runners experiencing the same awful smelling issues.  My suggestion?  No fruits or veggies before a long run, and try to "drop the kids at school" before you leave the house.  That may get you down to just gas.  (Further advice: always try to be first.  Not just to win, but because it places you out of the cropdusting danger zone.)  I sometimes imagine being propelled forward by these "power bursts" and often forget that though I cannot hear them due to my headphones, anyone I happen to pass will jerk their head in my direction.  So now I wait for the lonely backroads before I set myself free.

Lesson #3:  Gu, while effective, tastes like crap and feels like insect guts inching down your throat.  Think back to your first shots, chugging 'em back as quickly as possible and trying desperately not to puke in your mouth.  This is similar.  I gag every time, but I know I need easy fuel on those long runs.  So I stock up on what I deem the most unoffensive flavors and choke it back every 30 to 45 minutes.  My body thanks me nearly instantly upon finishing its initial revolt.

Lesson #4:  Slather yourself in BodyGlide.  I used to think myself quite special because I didn't chafe.  Turns out I just need to run farther.  Now I'm a chafin' fool.  So I got my first stick of Body Glide and have become a faithful user, applying wherever my skin touches clothing or other skin or armbands for my ipod.  I estimate I'll need another stick by the end of next week.  Chafe me once, shame on...my lack of chafing before.  Chafe me twice...Well, it's not gonna happen twice.  So there.

Lesson #5:  Always have frozen peas on hand.  They are excellent for icing sore knees upon finishing a distance run.  And it's economical and nutritious, too.  I bet you can't say that about any other ice packs.

Lesson #6:  Stretch mid-run.  I like to pause each hour and do a quick stretch while gagging on my Gu.  My legs thank me and I feel entirely refreshed when I start back up.  Stretch again for a longer time when you get home.  It's good for you and it feels delicious, too.  I call it my "poor girl's massage."  Plus, it gives me at least an extra ten minutes to excuse myself from tattling children and battles of who can do more and better math problems (no, seriously.  This happens.).

Lesson #7:  Rest before and after extra long runs.  I typically give myself one to two days beforehand and have watched my performance vastly improve.  The day after is also a rest day, but one involving as much non-workout movement as I can fit in.  Catch with the monkeys, a slow stroll, maybe another stretching session.  Just so the knees and muscles and hips and mind don't get all "We don't need no stinkin' workout" on me.  Sometimes you gotta remind those little whiners who's boss and that one day of hard work does not necessitate any lazing about.

Lesson #8:  If you're training for a half or a full marathon, you're gonna have to start blocking out some serious time.  Schedule in advance and be prepared to run in weather that doesn't involve sunlight or warmth.  Relish in being that batshit crazy person running in snow and rain or chugging along just as the sun wakes up.  Accept that sometimes life will get in the way and shorten your training sessions whether you pitch a fit about it or not (apparently, the universe does not care when I pout and make sarcastic comments).  The best way I've found to ensure I get my time in?  Schedule it the way I do anything else.  I will be busy at this time and Hubby must be present at home to prevent bloody battle wounds or playing with matches/running with scissors/etc.  Sometimes that requires asscrack of dawn pockets of time.  Deal with it.  If it's important, you'll find a way.  If it's not, you'll find an excuse.

Just Do It

It's raining.  It's cold.  The baby was up late and up early.  I simply did NOT feel like working out today.  But neither did I feel like being wracked with guilt later on for not completing today's workout goal.  So with a heavy sigh, I popped in Fire 55 EZ and strapped on my BeachBody gloves - because my goal is to wear my gloves for every cardio workout (I want to make Michelle Obama jealous).
And 55 minutes later? I was bouncing off the walls and feeling anything BUT guilty! Comfort zone? WHAT comfort zone? BOOYAH!
This moment is what I remind myself of whenever LazyMe pokes her head out from beneath the covers and says, "Not today." Because FabulousMe is so much more FUN to be (not to mention, her jeans fit oh-so-much better).
And that success carried over into lunchtime - when I prepared Chalene's chocolate protein pancakes for myself and the babe.  We devoured them with bananas and honey...and stayed away from the peanut butter cream pie and cheesey bread that had been so tempting before my TurboFire session.
I am still riding high on endorphins and goals accomplished.  My only regret is that I didn't discover the bliss of healthy living when I was younger.  Which is why, on a daily basis, my kids see me working towards fitness and health (and even join in from time to time - we ran our first family 5k just after Thanksgiving).  It pleases me to say that Chalene Johnson is a household name, and that those kiddos cheer me on when they see me doing P90X ("That is SO HARD, Mom! I can see your muscles getting bigger!").